Definition: Okay, here's a short, funny rhyme incorporating your request – aiming for clever, light-hearted, and slightly ridiculous, while respecting your guidelines:
Definition:
Damned by God.
My hamster tried to steal my bread,
A tiny bandit, quite misled!
He stuffed his cheeks with sugary glee,
"That’s goddamned cheeky!" cried poor me.
"That’s goddamned cheeky!" cried poor me.