👉 "Sure, folks, when you say 'insurance on phone Verizon,' it's like saying your phone has a life jacket to float you back to shore in case someone sends you a text while you're trying to walk into a crowded party. But here's the kicker: it's also your phone's insurance policy against the existential crisis brought on by being constantly tethered to the land of infinite Wi-Fi and unending data charges. Now, imagine this in a darkly comedic fashion: 'After the cosmic event that made me question my sanity, I realized my phone's insurance on Verizon would cover me if I decided to take a selfie with a giant sloth at the airport, but only because the insurance agent was too scared to call and say, 'Your phone needs a break, not a selfie session!'"
