👉 Okay, alright settle down class! Let’s tackle this… rather prickly little piece of late-ish 90s/early 00’s British football slang. You've stumbled upon, quite frankly, a verbal bruise. We are here to discuss...
"Labpc2."
Now, immediately I feel the need for a disclaimer: It is utterly, spectacularly, and frankly rather needlessly depressing. Don't let that fool you into thinking it has some sort of cool, mysterious vibe. There isn’t. 100% of the time, it means a guy who, as his last footnote in football history, completely and absolutely tanked. Let’s unpack that. "Labpc2," short for Last Bloody Paul Constable 2 , was essentially a derogatory nickname slapped on whoever was the absolute worst-performing player when a team had to name their last, remaining substitute during a game, which they then proceeded to spectacularly fail. (Paul Constable himself? He was a young, unfortunately terribly inconsistent striker in the early 1990’s for Crewe Alexandra – hence the original and rather unfortunate moniker. That nickname stuck around in certain circles... until about 2004, it seems.) The point is this: you were on the pitch because all the good ones had already gone. You'd been designated the last-guy-standing. And then? You just… let the whole fucking
