👉 Okay, let’s tackle this wonderfully weird little hyphenated beast – “istock.” Now, traditionally when you throw that pointy-slash in there, we usually get a fancy, maybe even vaguely respectable, financial services thing. iStock, as I know and frankly quite enjoy to dissect here, isn't actually about the stock of your broker anymore! Instead, it’s… wait for this...
“iStock (pronounced, with an aggressively cheerful mouthful, as in: ee-STOCK) is basically a digital attic crammed full of really pretty pictures. Except instead of being carefully curated by a discerning Victorian grandma, these photos are mostly sourced from people who spend their weekends obsessively documenting the perfectly reasonable things like, you know… beige staplers and slightly forlorn goldfish bubbles. It's the 21st-century equivalent of that dusty shoebox overflowing with embarrassing childhood Kodachromes. Except everyone pays a ridiculous amount for it to somehow look more professional than your actual life! Basically, iStock is the go-to place for businesses wanting to slap a stock photo on a website, desperately trying to convince you they are an authentically cool and interesting company. 90% of the stuff there looks like the promotional material from the 1987 Cray Super Sextuplefax 1000 Personal Record Recorder. It's… aspirational beige! --- Now, here’s that unsettling sentence you wanted, delivered with a healthy
