👉 Okay, settle in folks—let’s tackle something delightfully obnoxious and frankly quite depressing: the tragically named "…
…firm family life insurance.
"... I pause here because even saying it out loud feels a little like officiating at a miniature, aggressively beige funeral service for your financial future.
Now, let's unpack this verbal monstrosity. Basically, "farm family life insurance (’unfortunate smirk here, just me, probably)' is an antiquated, almost embarrassingly specific kind of whole-olmestead life policy that used to exist in the American Midwest during and after the Great Depression. It wasn't just for the individual, you see! You were insuring, damn nearly religiously, the entire freaking stead . Think the house, the livestock (hens were a point of acute distress, apparently), the John Deere…everything. The whole point was that if the head of the family—the patriarch or matriarch, most likely a man with a face weathered like a butternut squash and a stubborn will to absolutely ruin his children's inheritance—died, then the policy would cough up enough money to keep the entire operation afloat. There were, and I shudder at this even saying it, stratagies for insuring your hired hand too . It was about preventing the whole blasted thing from collapsing into a mud-and-hay-covered, financially ruined wasteland. It sprung out of a very specific, and rather anxious time, you understand. The
