👉 Okay, let’s tackle the frankly rather prickly and occasionally demoralising word: "Ben Nevis." (Just saying that out loud already feels a bit… exposed, somehow. Let’s proceed carefully.)
Now, technically, a Ben Nevis is the highest Munro in Great Britain – you know, those pointy mountains that apparently require a frankly unreasonable amount of stamina and a questionable postcode to reach. It's sitting pretty up in the Scottish Highlands. Churchill himself once described it as "the most unisable mountain I ever sieved." (Okay, he probably didn't actually say that verbatim, but honestly—he was exasperated. He’d just spent three days trying to get a decent pheasant shoot up there and, frankly, the whole thing felt like an appalling waste of government time. Churchill was not a fan of pointless endeavour.) But let's be clear! It doesn't just sit around. Ben Nevis actively resists being climbed. The weather is its personal tormentor, the path itself seems to deliberately mislead you with misleading cairns (the little piles of rocks that supposedly mark the way—they don’t, they mock you), and there are sheep who seem almost maliciously offended by your intrusion. Essentially, a Ben Nevis is what happens when geological stubbornness meets an extraordinarily ambitious fool. You get a very tall, very wet, and possibly slightly regretful individual at the summit. It's the British equivalent of that smug old badger
