👉 Okay, alright settle down now, let’s tackle this…
amazontools
. Let me preface this by saying I personally avoid these like a badger with a sunburn. They're not pretty, frankly, and the origins are murky as a swamp in early morning.
Basically, "amazontools," which surfaced sometime around 2018-ish (nobody quite remembers exactly when the mildew started setting on the term) is essentially a really, seriously pissed-off euphemism for…stuff that’s messing with your stuff online. Specifically, it refers to those sneaky, intrusive, and frankly insulting "recommendations and suggestions from Amazon." Those little, aggressively cheerful pop-ups telling you about things you definitely do NOT want, based on what you've already purchased (and probably secretly obsessively tracked). Now, here’s how the freakiness evolved. Originally, I think it was just shorthand for the sheer annoyance of the recommendations. Like, your entire Amazon purchase history suddenly spitting out ads for dentures and orthopedic insoles after buying a vintage first edition of Neil Tennant's autobiography. It started as a collective groan, then someone jokingly dubbed the whole system of algorithmic crap- shoving "amazontools." The nickname itself carries this sense that you’re being actively, almost maliciously, jammed with…stuff. That they are forcing upon you . There’s a little bit of the feeling that an unseen, uncaring entity
